Today I write my first blog and I chose to write about you – my pappa, as you were the one who taught me how to write my first alphabets in KG.I don’t remember since when did I started loving you so much but ever since then that love for you has kept growing in my heart even now when I don’t have you around. I remember those happy moments and days that I have shared with you as I grew up. I also remember the moments where you scolded me as a very good father would do for my mistakes. But what I miss the most about you is the bond that I shared with you which was more of being friends than being father and daughter. You were the only best friend I ever had in my life, who knew inside out of me, whom I shared everything about my day and my life.
I recall those days today when I fought with you for not taking medicines on time, for not taking care of yourself or even for making certain compromise in life for the betterment of Atit and me. I wish I could live all those moments all over again with you. Those days when I cried and you comforted me like a friend, those moments when I was low and you kept me afloat, those moments when I made decisions about my career and you stood by me without a doubt and those moments when I decided to chose my life partner and you stood by me like a rock. You have supported me every time unconditionally even when you had your doubts and I rebelled. You have protected me. I doubt now if I had been a good daughter to you, pappa. I wish you could be there to hold Rhea in your arms and be her friend like you were for me. I dream of you every single night, I talk to you every night but it still feels incomplete without your presence.
I don’t think I can express or pour my heart out even if I keep writing thousands of posts about you, but I will always be thankful to you for my lifetime. I will always remember and follow the principles you have taught me, I will make sure not to go for the wrong and easy paths and always choose what is true and right, I will try my best to teach Rhea same principles and morals as she grows up and try to be the same best friend to her as you were to me.
September is your birthday month, and for me this year it’s going to be a month of some huge decisions to make in my life. I know you are there just by my side every moment I pass, and you will guide me through this just like you always did to help me make the right decision. And I will stay strong and fearless like the tigress you always wanted me to be.
You have left a void in my heart and my life which no one can ever fill up. But I am happy that you were freed from the agony of those treatments you had to take and gone to a much better place. You have passed me your strength and fearlessness to choose the truth, and I promise to do the same no matter how painful it is for me for the life to come.
I love you a lot and I miss you so many words can’t explain.